The One Thing Your Teen Won't Tell You
Updated: Feb 23
Have you ever felt like no matter what you try, your teenager just won't listen?
Maybe you've even started doubting your ability to relate to own child?
If I tell you the one thing your teenager is keeping secret from you, I guarantee you won't believe me...
By the way, I just have to tell you this, you are a champion! Always trying to set the example for your children to follow, giving your best effort to be a role model in their lives. If nobody's told you recently, you're doing great job, don't give up!
Teenagers can complain about anything! Sometimes they can have a valid point, but many times they just don't see the big picture. They don't always see the sacrifices you make to provide for the home, they think you are just coming down on them when in reality, you just don't want them to make the same mistakes you made when you were their age.
My favourite thing to do is with teens is ask questions, I guess I'm still like a child in that sense. Even we've just met, I can guarantee I'll ask a serious life question.
Here is one of my favourite questions to ask teens, "Who is your role model?"
Every time I ask this question, I try my best to guess in my mind who they will say. I'm expecting a rapper, a celebrity, maybe an athlete but my mind goes all over the place in between the 5 seconds when I ask the question and when the student gives their answer. 95/100 times I ask this question, I get the same response;
This is the one thing your teen will not tell you..
"If I have to choose who my role model is...
it's my MOM and DAD."
I know, you probably think I'm lying, but I have no reason to lie. This is the most common response I get from students from every background, culture and home situation. You are their role model.
Teenagers can recognize who's authentic in their lives. No matter how much they disagree with you, they can never deny that without you, they'd be more lost than they already are. They know without any doubt, that no matter how bad they might fall, you will always be there to pick them up.
Theres a well known verse from scripture many parents know but have hard time believing it to be true. I can only tell you the testimonies I've heard over my years as a pastor of parents who saw the impossible become possible.
"Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it." - Proverbs 22:6
This truth has been proved time after time, year after year, tears after tears.
You are the most influential person in your teens life. When you are praying Heaven down on behalf of your child, in your room or in your car, our Heavenly Father hears every word. You'd be surprised how many students come tell me how they heard you praying for them at 1:00am in the morning.
So even if you aren't seeing the fruit of your labour right now, don't give up! Keep setting the example, continue to become more like Christ as the rest of your family follows in your footsteps.
I bet you've tried before to tell your child something and they simply refused to believe it, but when someone else told them the exact same thing, they believed it right away, right?
Remember I mentioned earlier that if I told you right away "the one thing your teen won't tell you", you probably wouldn't believe me?
Well, the one thing your child won't tell right now is that you're their biggest role model but maybe that's because you wouldn't believe them even if they did tell you. Hopefully this blog post has been that second voice to help you to start believing you are their biggest role model.
Keep Giving God Your Best,